Dear Boss
I would like to apply for some leave. Stress leave, rec leave, call it what you will. I have had it with my co-worker. He is constantly demanding, does not take direction, and is breaching all the workplace policies.
I love him to bits and would never work with anyone else (except of course his big brother who is currently in the education and training department till 2.35pm) however I do believe that he has crossed the line. He has no respect for privacy, follows me into the (ladies') toilets, refuses to leave, is constantly trying to hide under my skirt, and demands to flush.
He steals my tools. He broke my computer. Today he tied me up with my tape measure....around my neck. It was absolutely an occupational health and safety issue. I believe there may also be some need for a mental health screening - he believed I was a fish and that the tape measure was his fishing rod. Clearly delusional, he is a hazard to person and property.
I have had some questionable co-workers in the past, but this one takes the cake.Literally. And then smears it all over me.
Unpaid leave is fine. Fitting actually, seeing as I work 24/7 with no pay whatsoever.
Ah.....there's noone to backfill my position you say? No relief staff whatsoever? But wait....you say in 3 years time I can have a few hours off each day?
Well........I guess the deadlines can wait till then.
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